Yesterday

I was with some people. We were talking. One of the people said, “Can I have your phone number?” And he handed his phone to me. And I said in surprise, “My number?”

I’ve been thinking about that lately–that idea that I have had for a very long time that I am invisible. I don’t expect anyone to notice me. I don’t expect anyone to like me and want to be my friend.

And I’ve been realized how stupid I’ve always been. I always thought I was so inferior to other people. Now I’m just seeing how people-like they all are. How I am the same way. I thought the other day about how I never believed anyone would love me. I realized the other day how stupid that was. If so-and-so can be loved, why can’t I?

So much stupidity in my life. So much stupidity in my mind and heart. Probably in my spirit as well.

But, recognition means growth. The fact that I can see all of this means that I’m changing. While I was surprised by this new friend’s inquiry about my phone number, I was also alerted that my mind still works in that way to some extent. And that’s good; knowledge is important. Now I can be proactive. Praise God. 🙂

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